Alone on Thanksgiving? Mad at your mum? Look no further!
by Dizzy28
Summary: CC and Niles spend Thanksgiving tormenting, for a change, other people.


AN: Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! I don't celebrate this holiday, but you can bet Niles and CC find many a-way to bring mischief onto this particular festivity. Set in whatever season you like best, but probably after Pen-Pals. Just a fun little one-shot.

Any constructive criticism is encouraged and appreciated!

~Dizzy

* * *

He expects her to scoff at the offer, or maybe to go one further and throw her tea at his face. What he doesn't expect is for her to widen her eyes and look at him with confusion and - dare he hope - a hint of anticipation.

"You'd do that for me?"

His face breaks into an easy smile, and he quietens a particularly annoying thought, ' _I'd do anything for you_ '.

"As long as you assure me you've had all your shots," he replies instead, earning a deep chuckle and reveling in it.

"Careful, Butler Boy, I bite."

It's a good day when their teasing verges on flirting.

"If you don't mind taking a servant ten years your senior…"

"Just thinking about the face my mother will make gives me goosebumps, Niles, of course I don't mind," she interrupts him, her voice playful, and he grins widely.

"Then I'm your man!" He doesn't miss the way Miss Babcock's eyes give him a once over, and if he didn't know the Ice Queen as well as he does, he could swear she was blushing.

Of course, her steady voice betrays nothing. "That, Niles, is yet to be decided."

* * *

They're fashionably late to the dinner, and before BB's butler has time to announce them to the family, CC and Niles have already caught everyone's eye. Noel's the first one to rush over to CC, so wide-eyed she expects his glasses to comically fall off his face any moment.

"CC, you minx," he hisses at her, "the Sheffields' butler, really?"

CC fakes a wide smile for the numerous pair of eyes that are analyzing every detail of her and her _date_ , and she notices Niles has a little satisfied smile on his face, and when he stands with his hands at his back, perfectly mirroring BB's butler's posture behind him, she thinks she might die of laughter before the night's over.

"What, Noel, jealous?" CC teases, "it was my turn to give Mommy a fright this year. You came out last Thanksgiving."

Noel harrumphs in annoyance, and they stand elbow to elbow, eyeing BB, who is politely conversing with some of CC's cousins but sending daggers at Niles with her eyes.

"She doesn't look that affected," Noel comments disappointed, and CC shrugs.

Niles chooses that time to turn to the siblings and voice his opinion. "Maybe we can stage a breakup. Pretend I cheated on you with him," he adds, pointing to Noel.

CC cocks an eyebrow at him, and Noel laughs merrily. "Oh, I like him."

CC just pushes her chin up, lacing her arm with Niles'. "Well, get in line, this year's **my** turn." She drags Niles away, and elbows him on the ribs when he turns back to Noel one last time to mouth _Call me!_ at him.

Noel's laughter is still ringing in her ears when they make it to where BB is rushing to finishing her conversation, turning to the couple with the most fake smile CC remembers plastered on her face.

"CC, darling," she cooes, her voice shrilling a little on the endearment, before turning to Niles, speaking to him with no lack of disdain. "And who are you?"

"Mother, don't you remember Niles?" CC says, making a show of dragging her hand down the inside of Niles' arm and lacing their fingers together. "From the Sheffields."

"Hold on, this might jog her memory," Niles interjects, putting on his _poshest_ British accent before half bowing towards BB. "May I take your coat, ma'am?"

CC can't help but chuckle, and BB lets out something akin to a laugh, if it was coming from some sort of rodent. "Yes, of course, the _butler_ ," she replies, lacing the title with spite, "how kind of you, CC. Nowhere else to go on Thanksgiving, Niles?"

"No, ma'am, in fact I was planning on spending the whole day cleaning the Sheffields' bathrooms," he flashes BB his most charming smile, which of course has no effect, and seems to make her more uneasy, "but your daughter invited me, and well, I can delay the gratification of scrubbing toilets for her."

"Maybe you can do _that_ for Christmas," BB adds, completely unamused, unlike CC and Niles.

"No, I think we're visiting _my_ parents on Christmas, aren't we, _pumpkin_?" Niles replies, turning to CC, who devotes a second to thank the Lord for this butler's wit, and flashes him a wide smile, forcing all the love she feels for what is turning out to be the best Thanksgiving of her life into her voice.

"Of course, _baby_."

BB takes a couple of seconds to react, and CC takes the time to squeeze Niles' hand in encouragement.

"What's that now?" BB half-shrieks, and a couple of faces turn towards them, Noel's amused expression between them.

"Well, you always said I should _find me a man_ , Mother. I did just that," CC replies.

"I didn't mean a _manmaid_ , CC," BB hisses, no niceties left for Niles, who just tries his hardest to hide his bubbling laughter.

"I think you're being very rude to our guest, Mommy," CC says patronizingly, and BB positively trembles with silent fury, whilst Niles trembles with silent laughter.

"I didn't invite him!"

CC gives the most ham gasp years around Broadway actors have taught her. "I can't believe how rude you're being to your future son-in-law, Mother!" The minute the words leave her mouth, BB's eyes widen comically and she opens her mouth - no doubt to scream - but no sound comes out.

Niles and CC just stand there for a couple of seconds, marvelling at the view of a _quiet_ BB Babcock, before CC breaks the silence. "I won't take this one more moment, Mother. We're going," and with that she drags Niles through the living room by the hand, as BB can only look on in horror.

They're almost at the doorway - _freedom_ CC thinks - when Noel cuts their way. "You're leaving me here alone?"

CC just smiles evilly as Niles opens the door for her. "Don't be a spoilsport, Noel. I'll let you borrow Niles next year," she says, chuckling evilly as she slams the door closed behind them.

* * *

Once their laughter subsides, and Niles feels sure he won't randomly burst into a fit of giggles and crash the towncar, they start driving back towards CC's penthouse. They lapse into a comfortable silence, which Niles breaks a few miles from BB's home.

"So, when are you telling her the truth?"

CC turns to him with a half-smile. "Christmas. Saves me a gift."

Niles chuckles, and shakes his head slightly. He's about to reply when CC's stomach grumbles loudly.

"The beast awakens…"

CC punches his arm, and he laughs. "Shut up, Scrubbing Bubbles. It's your fault we didn't have dinner."

"You told her we were getting married, Miss Babcock! I think this one's on you," Niles replies with a grin.

" _Implied_ we were getting married. Besides, I'd rather starve here with you than have dinner with my family."

"Well, I'm sure I'll regret not letting you starve, but I'm taking you to dinner."

CC turns to him and cocks an eyebrow. "You know the whole _date_ thing was just to spook my mother, right?"

Niles sneaks a peek at her for a moment before turning back towards the road. "Believe me, Miss Babcock, if your mother saw the place we're going, she'd drop dead."

"Let's call her, I'll pay."

* * *

He hasn't touched his food in five minutes, but he's amazed at the fact that he's sitting on a car at the parking lot of McDonald's seeing Miss Babcock happily _devouring_ a greasy burguer. She eventually notices he's been staring at her for half of the meal and she swallows loudly before speaking. "What?"

He's a bit startled at being caught staring, but he improvises, throwing a few napkins at her lap. "Wipe your face, McDebutante."

CC wipes the non-existent stains on her mouth sheepishly, and goes back to the burger undeterred. "Where has this thing been all my life?"

"Judging by your volume, I would have said your hips."

CC rolls her eyes at him, and throws him a fry, which he deftly catches after it has bounced off his seat, and pops it in his mouth.

"Gross."

 _On a silver platter_ , Niles thinks. "I've had worse. Remember that time we kissed?"

"I'd rather not," CC deadpans without missing a beat, and Niles smiles widely.

They finish their Thanksgiving meals in silence, and Niles takes a minute to mourn the fact that the night's just about over, before placing his hand on the ignition. Before he can turn the key, though, CC places her hand over his, and he looks up at her quizzically.

"We haven't said what we're thankful for," CC says simply.

Niles thinks for a second before rising his empty soda cup. "For plans gone well."

She raises her cup imitating him, and thinks for a moment before a twinkle of mischief crosses her blue eyes. "For stuck-up mothers."

Niles toasts his cup to hers and grins. "Hear, hear."


End file.
